Being that Perpetually Late Person is Actually Effin Embarrassing

You wake up suddenly out of your slumber and look at the time. You are on a roll you think to yourself. Making your way to the bathroom, you shower, brush your teeth, get dressed, and look at the clock. 10:30 am. Your class starts at 1pm and you have some time to spare. So, you decide to turn on some music and take a tad bit longer on your makeup, making sure to get your winged liner just as perfect as Adele's. You decide you'll also have time for some glittery shadow. You gaze at yourself and gloat at how freakin sexy you look and mentally thank your parents for creating such a badass human being. Time, 11:30 am. You are still kinda good. Breakfast is almost ready and your tea is halfway drunk. But, as you gather your things, you can't remember where your key is. Your bag is still not packed, your phone isn't charged, and you still need to purchase some bus tokens. Time 12:00 pm. It takes about an hour and a half to get to school. Mood: Shit, I'm screwed.

I'll admit it, I've been late quite a bit in my little lifetime. For school, not so much work (obviously because my ass will get fired), meeting up with people, appointments, etc. With that said, I'll admit that being late isn't a great feeling. You feel bad because when you arrive at an event whether 10 or 15 minutes later, you realize that you might be one of the few people that is late and conclude that you could have done better. There are several other people who have arrived on time, so why didn't you? Why I'm always late I'll give to poor planning, my distaste for the mornings, and procrastination.

These aren't excuses, but I should provide some reasoning for my screw ups. Recently, I have gotten a bit better, however. I'm not where I want to be yet, but little improvements definitely make a difference. I've realized that getting a full eight hours sleep is actually very beneficial to waking up on time and feeling refreshed and energized when we rise and is actually the truth and not just from the studies we've heard since eighth grade. I read an article recently that basically glorified being late. If we've always been we should just except it because it is a part of who we are. But, I don't think that's so. As much as I have been late, I'm not proud of it. It's embarrassing to always walk into a room with eyes on you for the wrong reasons. It is also a good practice to be on time because then it is something that automatically happens for us. Other people's time also needs to be respected. I'm working on it and slowly I will definitely be getting to where I need to be on time because I damn sure feel accomplished when I am on my A game. Besides, being on time leaves us less stressed. Life is stressful enough damn it and our tardiness shouldn't add to that.

From A's to D's, But I'll Survive

For college and uni students, grades are an important part of the academic process. They aren't as important as we think, which is something one realizes as she goes along, but I'll get to that later. Grades are an important part really just for the sake of passing the program you are in. Really and truly, and as time goes on, a student will realize that passing in college/uni is one hell of an accomplishment. In high-school, good grades come easy for some, and I was one of those people. I was damn well hardworking back then (probably a little too much but we'll discuss that in another blog) and I was passionate about always being better and looking for ways to improve not only my grades, but I applied what I had learned academically to myself on a whole. Yeah, pretty Oprah Winfrey inspired.

Now however, although the drive and determination is still there, my grades these days are less then peachy and sometimes it can get discouraging. I'm a Professional Writing major at York University as I mentioned before and that program in itself is quite unique, compelling, intense, challenging, and because some of the courses are boring, it feels like more effort has to be exerted in order to do well. There's really nothing worse than when the professor of one of your classes begins handing out the grades for students and when he comes across yours, is left with an expression of confusion on his face as to why you did so bad. LOL.

Yeah, this happened to me recently. My grades overall aren't horrible but they have dropped in certain places and when I begin to see other students around me with better grades it can really feel like I'm drowning. It feels this way not only because I feel I did bad, but also because I often struggle to find my place in my degree. I ask questions such as, "What will I even do with this degree?" "Why am I in writing?" "Can I even write that well?" and finally, "Is this my passion?" These are questions countless students ask themselves as they continue to pursue their degrees and go on in their quest to find their passions.

I think it's great that some people know from day one what the f*ck they want to do with their lives and degrees. Fantastic. But for some, however, it's a little bit more confusing down the line and doubts and bad grades only intensify that feeling. What I am learning now however, is that I need to embrace the "bad" grades I have gotten because that shows I have something I can learn from and these grades can motivate me to do better and be better. Which it has by the way. Getting the results we don't desire actually means that we are accepting imperfection which is a part of life. So, I'm going to try to embrace failure, even though it will be hard considering my type A nature, but I will start with where I am and what I have learned thus far. Bottom line, with whatever happens, I know I was destined to be great.

It's Not Cocky to Say You are Awesome: You Deserve It

In today's narcissistic, "every man for themselves" society, it is very easy to feel lost in the crowd, especially with all the expectations that are placed on us as people. No one wakes up in the morning thinking about how great a job you did at work the other day, or how fantastic it is that you have found a new hobby, or the fact that you are beginning to gain a newfound confidence in your craft. Positive accomplishments as such do indeed deserve recognition, but realistically, sometimes we are burdened with more negativity then anything and because of this, we beat ourselves up.


We beat ourselves up for thinking we are not as great as someone else, we beat ourselves up for not being where we want to be in our lives/careers, we beat ourselves up because we feel as if we aren't enough, and finally, we beat ourselves up based on the opinions of others. Constantly, we are bombarded with distractions that tell us we can't do certain things and that we are limited in our accomplishments.



However, it is important to work on changing that mindset. Yes, everyone has things that need improvement and yes we do have insecurities within us that tell us we can't be successful in whatever it is we desire for ourselves, but nonetheless, we deserve to give ourselves credit for how far we have come and what we bring to the table as people. We have to do this for ourselves, because constant validation from other people is close to nonexistent.



For me, I'm damn proud of myself for starting a blog and expressing my authentic voice. I'm proud that I am a writer and a fabulous one at that. I'm proud that in spite of succumbing to negativity sometimes, I am determined to build myself as a person and thus keep going. I'm proud for continuing on with charm and class on a daily basis even through I struggle with depression from time to time, and I'm proud for being unique, articulate, ambitious, creative, and having the ability to connect with people. Acknowledge your strengths despite feelings of inadequacy and fear in this world. Start small by beginning to see yourself as awesome. Not only will it take you far, but you deserve it.

5 Ways Blogging Gives you Confidence as a Person

In today's world, there are tons and tons of blogs to read that range from a variety of different topics. There are fashion blogs, technology blogs, cooking, lifestyle, and even blogs dedicated to feminism. The list is truly endless because everyone out there has a story and ideas to contribute regardless of whether or not you are a professional or well seasoned writer. Previously, my ass was clueless to the blogging world. I was at a point where I was really trying to find my place as a writer and contemplated whether or not the title of "a writer" should even be associated with my name. I know doubtful right? But I'm human and that kind of mindset comes along with self-discovery and career building. Everything takes time. Now, however, I am proud to say that I absolutely LOVE being a blogger and I am kinda blog obsessed these days. But I have a reason to be because blogs are awesome and so is blogging. Here are 5 ways that blogging gives you confidence as a person.

1. You feel like a total badass because what you have written is yours

As a writing major who is determined to better my craft, taking a look at what I have written is truly liberating. You actually have the chance to see for yourself how much you have grown as a writer and as a person by analyzing and editing your own content.


2. You are voicing your opinion.

In today's age of social media, we do indeed have the opportunity to voice our different opinions on various platforms. However, sometimes the amount we put out there is limited because of the domain. Sometimes I have to remind myself that FB isn't my blog and thus the paragraph posted just isn't needed. When you have your own blog however, you have a voice that isn't constrained because of the ability to say whatever tf you want.


3. You actually feel like you have accomplished something big, however small.

Every accomplishment in life should be viewed as big, but in the grande scheme of things, we equate "big" things with landing a writing internship, getting our articles published on other sites, or getting a book published. However, having your own blog is god damn powerful. It's yours, you say what you want, you have the ability to impact lives, and you are developing your writing skills. You are one one foot in the door, and every writer, every person, needs a head start.

4. It allows you to grow intellectually as a person because you are bettering your life and thinking

We spend so much time these days on social media just browsing and wasting time. But a blog allows you to have something productive to do on a daily basis. You get to talk about solid and relevant issues that matter beyond likes and hashtags.

5. It gives you a creative edge

Finally, not everyone is a blogger and not every blogger will be able to blog like you do. Your voice is unique and special. It's always great to know you have finally found a talent that is fun and gives you some damn personality.

6 Things the Perpetually Nice Person Experiences

It's often said that "nice people finish last." Not sure if that is the actual quote, but the way I coined it makes it an accurate statement. Nonetheless, this is a world of the fast and the furious. Where we are taught to look out for ourselves and that being too sensitive gets you absolutely no where. I can vouch for that statement partially because even as a super softy myself, it is crucial to tough it out in uncomfortable situations and be assertive when we need to, because unfortunately, that's just how the world operates. However, who wants to be a bitch or a a total douche bag just because society says so? There is a fine line between becoming a cold hearted human being and being strong, assertive, and savvy. If you are a naturally kind hearted person, I can tell you that it is definitely difficult to find a balance between nice, too nice, and a total bitch. Here are 6 things that happen as the perpetual nice guy.

1. You begin to reveal your inner diva and then feel bad about it.

I am sure that there are some people who were total softies at one point and then became that "ruthless" person. It happens. It happens because places like the work place need bold people who get things done and who aren't easily swayed or offended by the opinions of others. I think my last point is valid, but I am sure most nice people go through the stage (me currently) where they say bold shit, do bold shit, and then feel like a bad person who totally feels like they run the world.

2. You are naturally friendly and charming towards people, and when it's not reciprocated, you feel like you are an alien from outer space.

It's definitely easy for nice people to feel like they belong on Mars. Of course there are super nice and bubbly people in the world. I come across them everyday along with the sour ones. However, most people these days are not so bold in their expression of kindness because of what has been ingrained in us otherwise. So when we feel bold enough to smile at a person randomly, we shutter quietly as that person greets us with a straight face.

3. You begin to get apprehensive when dealing with people.

Whether you are introverted or extroverted, you are a pleasant person and who doesn't like pleasant? However, because of your previous situations with people who put a damper on your happy bubble, you assume everyone in the world has a heart of stone.

4. You are utterly relieved when you meet other nice and bubbly people.

When you finally meet people that share in your automatic flavour of exuberance, you feel that yes, there is hope for me and the rest of us nice souls and there is definitely a space for me in this world. You figure that you can go ahead and randomly compliment people without feeling like an overly friendly weirdo after all.

5. You may be sensitive, and feel that because you are you can't take on the world

I am definitely guilty of this. I'm naturally sensitive and because things get to me sometimes, I'll assume that I can't pursue my dream of becoming a speaker and my life is doomed and confined to the walls of my bedroom.

6. You waver between being a bitch and and a softy.

Finally, you go through periods where you actually wonder if you should just be a bitch and call it a day, figuring that yes, now my life will be easy and people will never take advantage of me.

Truth is though, I don't regret being nice because I can be assertive and still make people feel like they matter. That's pretty damn awesome.

It's OK to NOT be OK...

Being vulnerable and open with our emotions is something I think a lot of people sway from. When we feel sad, we try and stuff our feelings down in the hope that it will go away. We do this with food, people, media, distractions that take us away from our problems. However, when we feel sad, we feel it deeply and wholeheartedly and secretly yearn for someone to look into our eyes and tell us that everything will be ok. Even if this isn't vocalized, it's a fleeting thought for most because it is a natural human condition to feel connected to each other. To feel like yes, I am feeling sad today, but you know what, someone else gets how I feel.


I'm not talking about depression, which is much deeper. I am talking about sadness. An empty feeling that consumes one sometimes and passes by like a stranger uninvited in the most abrupt and unexpected way. It's like being out in the sun, enjoying the view of the grass and the sounds of kids playing and then, BOOM, a cold wind hits you in the pit of your soul and stays there while the sun continues to radiate throughout the day.It comes randomly, as a reminder that life isn't perfect. I know this has been experienced by everyone because we cannot be happy 24/7 despite the fact that this is what the world expects of us. I know this is true because as time goes on and different experiences fill the lives of different people around us and at different times, and as social media portrays countless images of "happiness" for different people, we yearn to find our solace and our sense of peace. I know this is true, because someone is not always there to tell us that they understand and we are left to place the puzzle pieces of our emotions together for ourselves.


I'm so incredibly open about how I feel, because it is healthy to reveal that yes, I feel like crying sometimes and yes it's a struggle to find my way in this big world because I have been taught to put the pieces of my life together for myself and sometimes I feel lost, confused, and frustrated. I'm open about it because it is my place not to cover up the emotions that have been thrust on me as a human being for fear of being ridiculed and judged, despite the fact that the girl you saw the other day very well may have cried herself to sleep. I'm open about it, because being sad sometimes isn't our fault but is a part of life and I guess our job is to accept this and find our way to peace. It's OK, not to be OK sometimes, because you know what, it will pass, and it will happen time and time again as life changes from day to day, but at least you know now that you aren't alone.

What Working Retail has Taught Me

Getting a job, whether part-time or full time is a great experience, especially if you are fresh to the working world. You get a chance to really see how things work in particular job sectors and you get to meet a lot of great people. Some, not so great, but they nonetheless teach you something. Getting a job however, can be nerve-racking. The interview processes these days require you to really stand out from the crowd and know your stuff. You have to search the company before arriving at your interview, ensure that you are pleasant to ALL people within the company (even people who are not interviewing you), and you have to ensure you SPEAK UP by asking employers questions and standing out in group interviews. I am on the reserved side, but I have a knack for talking to people and being charismatic in these situations, despite the fact that I have a long way to go. I have worked retail and I can definitely say this is a great industry, particularly for people who want to get themselves out there more. Here are 6 things I have learned thus far.

1. You have to jump right in there. Fresh off the scene or not!

I know this is a must for any job, because you have to show initiative and jump right in there when you first start, but nerves and confusion can get in the way sometimes. However, in retail, you have no choice but to get your ball in the court as soon as you clock in because people will be expecting you to know your stuff especially if you are working in a big establishment. People everywhere want to know where the closest escalator is, what the price check on something is, where the bathroom is (...), and where the closest cash register is. So really, even if it is your first day, there really is no time to twiddle your thumbs in retail.


2. You learn to speak up

Even if you are not working in retail, a job forces you to speak up anyway because obviously you need to be heard if you have questions or concerns, or especially if you have a boss who expects you to be outgoing. Sucks for introverts, but that is how it goes. Nonetheless, retail gives you a voice you may not have had before and this will happen whether you are prepared for it or not. You are the first person people see on the floor before they get to cash, so first impressions are everything. And if I might add, coming from someone who likes an excuse to talk to people and be my bubbly over friendly self, it is actually fun after a while.

3. You have a reason to look cute at every freakin shift

Retail is all about fashion, whether basic or Louis Vuitton type ish. It is an industry that is based much on fist impressions so it is a great opportunity to dress up and look professional, especially for people who are already into that vibe anyway. You also get to learn new fashion trends from your employees and see first hand what the go to looks for the season really are.


4. You start to want everything in the store. Literally.

When working retail, you are surrounded by cute ish every minute of the day while you are at work so it is so hard not to want to try to coordinate an outfit while you try and get a nagging customer that last pair of jeans that is in stock. You will probably end up putting every item you can on hold but if you are broke as hell like me, keeping shit in a budget is the way to go.

5. You learn to deal with various personalities.
As much as we would love for everyone in the world to have a heart of gold, that is not how it works. There will be rude customers who blatantly ignore your charming hello, annoying kids running around the store and heading towards your freshly stocked shelf, and bosses and employees with strong personalities. However, different personalities allow us to really toughen up for the real world, because the truth is, there are all TYPES of people.

6 You gain more respect for employees when you go shopping

Before I worked retail, I was one of those people who did not give af if I just threw a jacket over a perfectly clean rack because I just assumed that someone would be there to take it up and fix it. However, working in retail can be frustrating because you have to ensure your assigned sections are cleaned before the end of the night, something that can be hard to accomplish when people are constantly messing up shelves and throwing things around carelessly. So, when you shop for yourself, you remember those annoying customers and will go and make an effort to fix that sweater that fell off the rack. Well...sometimes. :p