Perfectionism is a problem and we need to acknowledge that

Just recently, I realized that I have a problem. We all have some sort of problem really, but sometimes it takes experiences that happen over and over again for us to get the lesson that we need to get. There’s a quote that says, “God will keep you where you are until you get the lesson.” Before when I saw this quote, I would just say yeah, that is some inspirational ish, which is usually my reaction to anything inspirational. It’s in my nature. But lately, I have noticed that life is imperfection. To my readers thinking, no shit life is imperfection, it isn’t a fairytale, I would say that you are slightly in denial because I think we all believe everything is supposed to go smoothly for us. This is why when we are faced with one little obstacle, we can’t take it because we had this idea in our heads of the way things are supposed to go. I’ll give you a perfect example.


I just started writing for a blog site and once I got accepted I became ecstatic. The site is pretty well known and has millions of readers. Usually when I see other people writing for blog sites, I think wow, she has really gotten somewhere with her writing.
Some writers like myself, usually suffer from low self-esteem when it comes to our writing. That’s just the truth. We think we aren’t good enough when we should be giving ourselves props for even writing in the first place, but, I digress. So I got in and thought, damn, my ass is gonna be famous and because I am in everything will just go off from here and that begins the story of a simple girl turned into an overnight success. WRONG. LOL.

First of off, my narcissist mindset definitely needs to be kept in check, because writing for a blog site isn’t about fame, it’s about art and advice. Simple as that. And because I was focused so much on my blog being accepted, my second article just wasn’t up to par for publication as yet and my first article got rejected. Not really a big deal and not really a life threatening crisis, but nonetheless, we all have moments where we think everything is supposed to go smoothly and that just isn’t the case. Things will get rejected, things will take a while to come, jobs will not fall into our laps immediately, and happiness and success won’t come overnight. This my friend, is the truth, but because I’m not one of these bloggers who ends things on a pessimistic, that’s life now get over it note I will end with the positive. The good will come. It will come from patience and persistence. This is a literal note to myself by the way. Patience and persistence. Patience is actually the number one key here because eventually good shit will happen but we perhaps need to take a few moments to just chill out. Previously, I never blogged, I didn’t write as much as I do now, never even thought I would contribute to a blogging site, and excitedly for me, I have actually gotten around to creating a vision board, yayyy. So, let’s just all chill out together and realize that life isn’t a fairy-tale but is full of lessons to be learned

What Girls Really Mean When They Say They Hate the “Nice Guy”

We’ve all heard the line, “Nice Guys Finish Last”. It’s a pretty blunt line, but I thought I’d give it a shot at defining what it actually means from a female perspective. When girls say they don’t like the nice guy, they mean they don’t want a damn pushover and a naïve soul. They don’t want a dude that seems like he is a yes man to almost everything simply because he feels like he is appeasing you. Fellas, let me tell you from now, that shit will not get you anywhere, especially if you are with someone who is perhaps introverted by nature. This is because females, as much as men, like adventure and women want someone who will add something extraordinary to her life, something that slightly differs from what she is usually accustomed to.


We like when guys have the ability to make us laugh, hold an intriguing conversation, and keep us on our toes. We like when you sometimes take the lead, not in a controlling way, but in a way that tells us you are trying to make your presence known. Everybody is made differently and I am not saying that people should start to change themselves, because simply put, some people are just not meant for each other. Personalities have to match and play off of each other, but everyone can benefit from learning not to be a complete bore. I wouldn’t say I’m the most adventurous person at this point in my life, and there are probably some things about myself that some guys find boring.


Cool, but I’m just not for them. But what I can say is that I try and make my presence known, laugh, and put the effort into making myself seem like I got it going on even if I don’t. So ladies, I totally feel you when you just get totally annoyed if a guy is acting stiff and slightly as if he has no backbone. I’m straight up and I can tell you from now that shit annoys me. I’ve told some friends this in the past, so people know I keep it real. This doesn’t have to even be all about relationships. It can be about friends as well. For me, I just don’t like guys who don’t interest me, even if we are friends. I like a sense of excitement in my life, especially if you are a male because I am getting a feel of the male perspective on things for a change. But if we are going to talk about relationships, this isn’t about finding someone who is a prick. It’s about finding someone who makes you feel secure and is assertive. Someone who doesn’t make you feel intimidated, but is confident, and not pompous, which in turn leaves you feeling at ease. I can go on, but I think you guys get the point. It’s all about personality and looks are just the delicious bonus.