Social Media: I Take Breaks. Here's Why.

Ahh, social media. The pics, the likes, the updates. It's all shoved into our faces every single moment we decide to log onto our social media accounts. It has become a major part of our culture and is known as the culture that perpetuates the notion to be seen, heard, recognized, and ultimately, validated. I'll admit it, I enjoy social media at times and who doesn't. I would be a complete fake if I sat here and wrote this article without expressing the fact that I post pics of myself, awesome pics, and construct my social media pages in the best way possible.

That's what it is for. Social media is meant to highlight the best of the best, the glam and the happenings. Of course there will be occasional posts that are sad and draw the attention of fellow social media users, or stories that perhaps captivate us at the heart.

There are posts begging others to sympathize in the midst of a lost loved one, and posts that rant and rave about how awful the day is going. However, for the most part, we post the good. We post the good so that we can of course showcase how proud we are of ourselves and what we may have accomplished, but we also showcase the good for appraisal. It's just how it works. However, what can also happen in the midst of our social media craze, is the need to compare ourselves to other people, appear perfect at all times, and because what we wish to share is only a click away, we voice our opinions sometimes without truly thinking. For me, I have caught myself getting distracted by the lives of other people and have definitely posted without thinking, posted too much, and have succumbed to the pressures to be perfect. So, I take breaks. I truly try and tap into what it means to be human outside of this technologically crazed generation, and try and tap back into my life beyond the likes and posts. I take breaks so I can redefine who I am again. I take breaks because it's tiring to constantly be technologically charged and emotionally drained. I take breaks, because I am often a different person outside of social media. I am not saying we should not showcase our best selves and share our moments with others, but what I am saying is that time spent to be human and really re-evaluate our lives is necessary for our sanity.

Your Path Won't Look Like Anyone Else's : Delight in That

<3

Hii, I'm back people's! Did ya miss me??? (Y'll better say yes and with a smile) LOL. Today's discussion is on the journey or in other words, your journey. Have you ever sat and thought to yourself, why haven't I gotten the job yet, the boyfriend/girlfriend perhaps, the career goals put together, the interesting experiences filled with travel and bliss? We all have and let's be honest, sometimes all this thinking can get to us and make us feel pretty crummy. Now I'm not into the comparison game, but let's be honest, sometimes it creeps up on us. We get distracted by what's around us and assume that whatever everyone else has going on means that we need to be experiencing that as well, which in fact my friends, is far from the truth. I know personally that I am my best self when I am focused on me, and I am in that process now. The point is, that you will get to a stage where you realize that you can't be like everyone else and your journey is strictly what works best for you and the flow of your life. Don't worry if Becky got a job, be happy for Becky and know that your time is coming and in your way. Joy will be yours. The best thing we can do for ourselves is focus on OUR journey, and trust me, I am still learning this daily. It is called OUR journey for a reason...What works for you is what works for you. If you really think about it, having a warped mentality of how are lives should be going is so damaging. Do you and just live your life. I know with social media its easy to get caught up, but your path is so unique and empowering in its own way. Less distractions means learning more about ourselves. Happiness lies in discovering our path and truly keeping that as our focus. Your jounrney, yo business, your way. #notetoself Hugs and kisses ya'll

You don't have to do what everyone else is doing...

"Heyyyyyy, yaaaaaaaa!" Forgive me as I quote "Outcast" people. Damn, music back then was poppin. How are you guys? Hopefully you are peachy and just fabulous, and if not, allow me to sprinkle some happy dust on you. *Sprinkles dust* LOL I'm crazy ya'll you know this already. Anyway, I'm sitting here in Starbucks now sippin one of the most amazing freakin fraps (Pumpkin Frapp, go and get that ishh right away) and I am having a moment of deep, insightful awakening. This my friends, is the notion that you can live your live exactly the way YOU want to live it. Let us both meditate on these words for a moment. You can live your life exactly the way that YOU want to live it. Now, I have mentioned this in my other blog posts, but I am a super sensitive person. I am not going to deny that. As a matter of fact, for all of my sensitive souls out there, your sensitivity is actually a gift. You have the ability to relate to others on an emotional level, while also tapping into your logic. Pretty cool if I do say so myself. Moving further, I sometimes have the tendency to get offended easily. If someone says something regarding my persona as a more reserved person perhaps, and this is usually involving people of a much more extroverted nature, I tend to feel uncomfortable and judged.

Or, a more popular comment, especially amongst young people, is the notion of turning uppp and all the way up and if you aren't drinking, partying, and being what society deems as cool, you are just weird. I know for a fact at least ONE of my readers can relate to this. Now on my part, I just need to learn not to get offended so damn easily, and that my friends, with all things in this life, comes with time and I will get there. However, I have learned something positive from these encounters, and that is that you live your life the way you want to live it. If you feel like turning all the way up, turn up, but don't judge someone else for not having the same experiences that you have had. For me right now, I'm focused on becoming a better writer, building confidence and resiliency, discovering my God given purpose, and just being an all around kick ass person. We are all here to live our individual lives and enjoy happiness, success, and all the other goodies that come along with this life. However, as you will realize as time goes on, someone will always have something to say to you, whether it be positive or negative, but remember that you don't have to take in what everyone says to you, as in to become an external mold, built from the opinions of others. This is why it is often a struggle to find ourselves in life, because there are so many damn expectations of who and what we should be. But, the only person you were created to be, is yourself. I am still learning that myself, and cannot wait for the day where I can fully and confidently stand in my truth, whatever that is. As Eleanor Roosevelt put it best, "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." So, do you and do what makes you happy. :)

Trying to Make my Path Clear: The Fogginess is Real

Now, before you cuss me out mentally for neglecting this blog, just hear me out. Writers have personal shit just like you, and basically, I'm in a space in my life right now where I am trying to figure out my life path and get my thoughts together, so going ghost on my part has its reasons. Nonetheless, because we love each other, I know I am already forgiven :) Anyway, questions hitting me lately have been, Who am I? What are my interests? What are my goals? What is my true purpose and what am I destined to do? I know, deep shit right? But the deeper the better, because it gives life meaning. How awful it would be if we just woke up day by day, went to school, went to work, went back home, just to do it all over again and not really have a sense of desire, or a hungriness for more?

That's where I'm at right now. In the midst of feeling confused as hell about how to be an adult, working, trying to hand in school assignments on time, and blocking out outside distractions that can bring negativity (this can be people and things), I am truly trying to carve out a life path for myself, and I know you are too, slowly but surely. I'm a Pisces by the way. Not sure if any of you are into astrology, but if you think it is evil, please don't preach to me, it's not that deep. I mention this only because my sign plays a role in how I think. We are dreamers and often lean more towards the arts, hence why I am a writer. For me, my mind is always dreaming. Either thinking about becoming an actress, public speaker, or best selling author...don't laugh, but my mind has always been in the clouds ever since I was little and that's ok. Lol. At least this means that although things aren't perfect now, the fact that my mind is focused on something greater, there are better things in store for me and you too. I know, it's hard sometimes to figure everything out, but we are in this together. Life is a game that has to be played whether we like it or not, but putting our minds to focus on things that give us joy can really make life feel meaningful. Things such as self-improvement, our dreams, and ambitions. It's a little foggy now, but I have faith that things will be clear pretty soon for us. Keep dreaming and keep hoping. Most of all, have faith. It's all working out, because we aren't here to just do just live and die. There is something much much bigger.

"Bang Ups and Hang Ups?"

It's August already people. Where has the time gone? I have indeed neglected this blog for a while, so please forgive me? We can share a cyber hug and a peck on the cheek if that's okay with you. I've neglected blogging and some other things perhaps, because I feel kind of confused about well, everything. Now I know, this blog is supposed to be positive and it is! Don't worry. I will graciously provide the goodies later on. But right now, I feel it is important to express how one is truly feeling and I honestly feel the pressures of young adulthood getting to me. The decisions, the responsibilities...ya feel me? For instance, people will ask me why I haven't gotten my license or what it is I am planning to do as a career once I finish school? I will say that some of these questions are far-fetched, but are nonetheless a part of this game we call life. But the path and pace for everyone is truly different. In spite of this, I guess I thought I would have everything figured out by now. I want to be swift and purposeful and have it all together, but it doesn't seem that way at all right now. When you look on social media sites such as Facebook and Instagram, on the surface, everyone looks as if they seem to have life all figured out. But what about the behind the scenes? What about the grind, the contemplation, the moments of frustration that people do not see? These are all real. However, I am a fighter and I'll figure everything out slowly but surely. Even as a writer, I will admit that I feel lost. I am in school for writing, but the actual title of a "writer" seems distant to me. Although despite that feeling here I am in front of my computer screen writing, because I refuse to give up and just throw in the towel and say "Life, take me as you will." I am now realizing that "Bang Ups and Hang Ups" push us beyond our limits. They force us to straighten out and really fight back when we are feeling defeated. Up is all we got people and we have to fight everyday to stay there and reach the stars despite how we may be feeling. The title of this blog post is inspired by Dr. Seuss's "Oh the Places You'll Go" and it does indeed discuss the bang ups and hang ups of life. He says, "You can get so confused that you'll start in to race down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space, headed, I fear toward a most useless place, The Waiting Place..." The Waiting Place is real indeed and is experienced by us all. It's uncomfortable and a little shaky. However, Dr. Seuss provides us with the encouragement that this too shall pass and is only a stepping stone to greatness. "Will you succeed? Yes you will indeed...Kid, you'll move mountains."

Mindful posts can save us; Social media can make us check ourselves

"Hate my life." #forever alone "She tried it. She really tried it." "I'm the baddest bitch...." You are probably reading these phrases right now and wondering what the hell am I saying, but these right here, are examples of posts that some of us might have been guilty of posting on social media outlets out of sheer naivety, anger, sadness, or boredom perhaps. Nonetheless, I am now realizing that what we post on sites such as Facebook really does impact how we are perceived by others. Sometimes it seems like we are just venting for ourselves perhaps, but we have to keep in mind that social media is "social" and other people are there to watch us from the sidelines. I'm not perfect and as I write this blog post, I am thinking about how I can be mindful of this in the future. I've been called out before on my posts, and it was definitely a lesson for me to either practice what I preach or simply be cautious of how I am being perceived by others. Social media sites are tricky because we are all aiming to craft out certain images for ourselves and usually how we think we are branding ourselves can be different from what others have witnessed. Now, don't get me wrong, this is helpful advice, but regardless of if we are doing good or bad in life, we will forever be judged and criticized until the day we die. That is just how life works and comes along with human nature. However, being mindful of what we say and do in this life can truly save our asses.

Managing your mental health is a learning process: You are never alone

Hey ya'll, hope you are all enjoying your summer! The weather is just beautiful daily out here! On another note, I'm blogging today about a topic that I believe is very imperative, whether you or someone you know has dealt with it or not. And that is, mental health, and finding ways to manage it in ways that will be beneficial to you. Now, I totally understand that not everyone can relate to this topic, hence why I try and not make EVERY single post related to mental health, and also for the mere reason of varying my content. However, this will be a topic I will always be an advocate for, because people out there who experience issues such as depression, anxiety, and any other mental illness, needs to understand that I understand and there are millions of individuals world wide who have gone through what you have gone through, even if you feel alone in your battle. I went through a very major depression in 2013, so bad that I literally thought I would never get better. In all of my young life, I have never experienced something so terrifying and mind altering. Now I am no psychologist, but for those who are wondering how depression works, I can explain that for you. Everyone has ups and downs emotionally. That is totally understood. This life is full of unexpectancies, happy moments, periods of enriching self-discovery, and all in all, different surprises that teach us the importance of learning from every experience. So low moods and high moods from time to time, are simply a part of life. However, there are low moods that can be a little different. The one that makes one uninterested in almost anything, sleeping more often, or loss of appetite. Or there is the more severe type, the one where emotional disturbances (severe low mood), leads to thoughts of hopelessness, insignificance, and even death. I experienced the second type of depression in 2013 but I am in a much better place now. However, it is still a daily challenge for me. I still have periods where I am praying I don't slide back down there. Now as a 20 year old woman, I have to look for ways to cope, because in all honesty, most people will not understand what you are going through, at all. Mental illness or emotional struggles are global issues, but experienced on a very personal level. No one will understand unless they have been there themselves and this lack of understanding can sometimes lead to conflict with others. It is very frustrating to feel like you yourself lacks understanding in how to cope, and others around you are trying to cope with you themselves. I'm here to tell you that I understand your pain. I understand your struggle, but you will get through. You just have to keep on fighting every single day and know that you are here for a very important reason. Make a journal of your emotional stability, excercise, eat healthy, listen to uplifting music. Look for ways to combat your challenges. Life is full of surprises, often unflattering ones, but remember, you are here for a very important reason. Peace and love.